Another year, another Perfect tree!
Cutting down the Chrismas Tree at Sargent Farm the weekend after Thanksgiving.
The girls enjoying their Christmas Photo Shoot
Wednesday, December 9, 2009
Santa....
Hayden has an interesting relationship with this guy, Santa. Last year she really had no clue about the whole thing, or so we thought. Then, in June I got her a Fisher Price Noah's Ark and she immediately identified Noah as "Santa". No amount of discussion or correction can change this. He is Santa. Now we're in the season of non-stop, neck deep Santa mayhem. We don't spend time in malls (even before the whole "Swine Flu" scare, we weren't big fans, but now the idea of hanging out in a petri dish of sneeze is even less appealing).
I explained the concept of Santa a few weeks ago, "be good.... keeping track....will bring something, maybe, depending on what you ask for, if you're good....". I asked Hayden what she'd like, and after thinking for quite a while she announced that she'd like "nunus and butter" (noodles and butter). I'm all about her shooting low. Of course, the fact that the only real choices she gets these days invlove what she eats and what book she reads before bed may have something to do with it.
But, last Thursday, we went to the annual Christmas lighting in downtown Exeter. We decided early on that we weren't going to wait in line to see Santa, since Hayden really didn't seem to care and the "terror to fun" ration just didn't seem likely to be in our favor. But, while we were waiting lin line for a hay ride, we saw Hayden's friend Ryan in line for Santa, and we went over to say "hi". In a very "Christmas Story" moment, Hayden was taken by the hand by an Elf and escorted up the stairs to Santa before she even had a chance to process the whole thing (or myself for that matter). The Elf explained that Santa was in a hurry and really didn't have much time, but he could say a quick "hello" (Santa is on a very tight schedule these days). To Hayden's credit, she didn't cry. She just clung to me looking pretty horrified by the whole experience. That is, until it was all over.
When we were done, she ran to Brian (who was still in line for the hayride) and announced that she had seen Santa.
"Did you talk to Santa?" Brian asked.
"Uh, hu," Hayden said excitedly. "I ask Santa Dollhouse."
"A dollhouse?" (This was so not on our radar).
"Uh, hu. Santa bring dollhouse."
I hope Santa was listening.
I explained the concept of Santa a few weeks ago, "be good.... keeping track....will bring something, maybe, depending on what you ask for, if you're good....". I asked Hayden what she'd like, and after thinking for quite a while she announced that she'd like "nunus and butter" (noodles and butter). I'm all about her shooting low. Of course, the fact that the only real choices she gets these days invlove what she eats and what book she reads before bed may have something to do with it.
But, last Thursday, we went to the annual Christmas lighting in downtown Exeter. We decided early on that we weren't going to wait in line to see Santa, since Hayden really didn't seem to care and the "terror to fun" ration just didn't seem likely to be in our favor. But, while we were waiting lin line for a hay ride, we saw Hayden's friend Ryan in line for Santa, and we went over to say "hi". In a very "Christmas Story" moment, Hayden was taken by the hand by an Elf and escorted up the stairs to Santa before she even had a chance to process the whole thing (or myself for that matter). The Elf explained that Santa was in a hurry and really didn't have much time, but he could say a quick "hello" (Santa is on a very tight schedule these days). To Hayden's credit, she didn't cry. She just clung to me looking pretty horrified by the whole experience. That is, until it was all over.
When we were done, she ran to Brian (who was still in line for the hayride) and announced that she had seen Santa.
"Did you talk to Santa?" Brian asked.
"Uh, hu," Hayden said excitedly. "I ask Santa Dollhouse."
"A dollhouse?" (This was so not on our radar).
"Uh, hu. Santa bring dollhouse."
I hope Santa was listening.
A long overdue update
It's five months later now and life is just chugging along so fast that there's hardly any time to update. But, the holidays are upon us now, so how about a quick recap of the past few months. When asked, Hayden said that she's most proud of the fact that she "close eyes and go night night on mat." She also, "play soccer right now" (with, in this case a plastic head from some long forgotten toy). After rolling the ball under the couch, she went to find "Baby Kaya" to ask where the ball might be. But, now, she's cheering her sister on as Kaya rolls back and forth on the floor. Other Kaya milestonse: She can sit up unassisted (for a few minutes anyway; then she topples over onto the floor.) She also eats rice cereal, which she seems to like, as long as you're willing to treat it like spackle and just keep on filling her mouth as she thrusts her tounge in and out. As for sleep, not great. Unlike Hayden, who didn't like going to bed on her own, Kaya is happy to be put down awake at night, and she can fall asleep on her own. She just wakes up. A lot. All night. Over, and over and over again, to the point that we're thinking of putting the number for the gypsies on speed dial. But, we're hopeful. Guardedly optimisitic.
As for Hayden, she talks up a storm and is a total big girl. Right now, she's "calling" Maria on the phone, and she'll probably have a long conversation about cabbages and kings, most of which will make sense to the casual listener. She knows she has brown hair, brown eyes, and she can name all of her body parts and the color of pretty much everything. Right now she's just announced that she's going to "go potty poop". She's had some success at daycare, but not at home yet. So, this could be a first.
Today we're all home doing the happy snowday dance. In a few minutes we'll decorate the Christmas tree (it's been up for two weeks. It went a week with no lights, and now it has lights, garland and bows. We're hoping to put the finishing touches on today.
As for Hayden, she talks up a storm and is a total big girl. Right now, she's "calling" Maria on the phone, and she'll probably have a long conversation about cabbages and kings, most of which will make sense to the casual listener. She knows she has brown hair, brown eyes, and she can name all of her body parts and the color of pretty much everything. Right now she's just announced that she's going to "go potty poop". She's had some success at daycare, but not at home yet. So, this could be a first.
Today we're all home doing the happy snowday dance. In a few minutes we'll decorate the Christmas tree (it's been up for two weeks. It went a week with no lights, and now it has lights, garland and bows. We're hoping to put the finishing touches on today.
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
Things I did not expect
1. Kaya sleeps! I'm sure I'm jinxing myself, cursing myself etc. etc. so on and so forth, but I'm going to come out and say it anyway. My girl sleeps! She's been sleeping from 11pm to around 4am, getting up to nurse and going back down until between 9:15 and 10:15. I've had to go in to make sure she's still breathing. But, before you hate me too much, remember that I am also the mother of the non-stop puking will not sleep ever child. So, this is nature's way of making sure Kaya survives infancy. (On that note though, Hayden went to sleep like a big girl tonight for the first time in a month after Daddy had a long talk with her about how she can do it...I think it was her Father's Day gift to him.)
2. I thought Hayden would be jealous of me nursing Kaya, because I can't really do much with her while Kaya is eating. What I didn't count on is that Hayden was/is TERRIFIED of seeing Kaya nurse. The first time she saw it she came running over yelling, "No, Baby! No!" and "Uh Oh Mommy!" She was desperate to get Kaya to stop. In all the "You're a Big Sister" books we got for Hayden, none of them mentioned breast feeding. They all said things like "babies drink milk" with pictures of a baby with a bottle. Fine, but not that helpful to our situation. So, we've talked about how the baby isn't biting Mommy and how the baby isn't hurting Mommy (which some of you know is only slightly true, since nursing hurts like hell the first week or two). But, she seems to have come around. Unfortunately now she says things like "Baby Booby?". I tried for "breast" but it just didn't feel right. I should have known that "booby" is way too much fun to resist saying.
3. Hayden and Maria are both obsessed with watching me change Kaya's diaper. It's like a national pastime for those two. I don't know if it's just that she's so small or if it's the fact that someone other than them has a diaper, but whatever it is, they seem to love the fact that Kaya is almost always poopy. Me, not so much.
4. Hayden has renamed herself and her sister. She is now "Dee Dee" and Kaya is "Ki Ki". Most of the time Kaya is "baby" but when pressed, she'll call her "Ki Ki". We don't discourage this.
5. I feel like our family is complete. I loved, loved, loved being pregnant and I really thought I'd mourn the fact that this is probably our last child, but at least in the last week (which I realize isn't much time in the overall scheme of things) I really feel like we're a family. With Hayden it felt like us as a couple with a baby, but now I really feel like we're a family in a more solid, complete way. I don't know if that makes sense, but it feels good to feel that way. Who knows, maybe we'll have more, but I feel like I can put away my maternity clothes without a pang.
6. I think I had Post Partum Depression with Hayden. I don't know if it was to the point of being full scale PPD, but looking back now I can see that it was there. I remember being afraid to pick up Hayden, afraid to put her down, terrified about driving with her, feeling incapable of taking care of her basic needs, and feeling utterly dependent on Brian. Now, some of that is just first time parenting and some of it was because I was so incapacitated by the c-section, but I really think some of it went beyond all of that, or at the very least came out of that and then grew. In the past week, I feel like myself. Not some supermom but not an incompetent freak who doesn't deserve children. Just me.
I'm sure there's more but my baby is calling....
2. I thought Hayden would be jealous of me nursing Kaya, because I can't really do much with her while Kaya is eating. What I didn't count on is that Hayden was/is TERRIFIED of seeing Kaya nurse. The first time she saw it she came running over yelling, "No, Baby! No!" and "Uh Oh Mommy!" She was desperate to get Kaya to stop. In all the "You're a Big Sister" books we got for Hayden, none of them mentioned breast feeding. They all said things like "babies drink milk" with pictures of a baby with a bottle. Fine, but not that helpful to our situation. So, we've talked about how the baby isn't biting Mommy and how the baby isn't hurting Mommy (which some of you know is only slightly true, since nursing hurts like hell the first week or two). But, she seems to have come around. Unfortunately now she says things like "Baby Booby?". I tried for "breast" but it just didn't feel right. I should have known that "booby" is way too much fun to resist saying.
3. Hayden and Maria are both obsessed with watching me change Kaya's diaper. It's like a national pastime for those two. I don't know if it's just that she's so small or if it's the fact that someone other than them has a diaper, but whatever it is, they seem to love the fact that Kaya is almost always poopy. Me, not so much.
4. Hayden has renamed herself and her sister. She is now "Dee Dee" and Kaya is "Ki Ki". Most of the time Kaya is "baby" but when pressed, she'll call her "Ki Ki". We don't discourage this.
5. I feel like our family is complete. I loved, loved, loved being pregnant and I really thought I'd mourn the fact that this is probably our last child, but at least in the last week (which I realize isn't much time in the overall scheme of things) I really feel like we're a family. With Hayden it felt like us as a couple with a baby, but now I really feel like we're a family in a more solid, complete way. I don't know if that makes sense, but it feels good to feel that way. Who knows, maybe we'll have more, but I feel like I can put away my maternity clothes without a pang.
6. I think I had Post Partum Depression with Hayden. I don't know if it was to the point of being full scale PPD, but looking back now I can see that it was there. I remember being afraid to pick up Hayden, afraid to put her down, terrified about driving with her, feeling incapable of taking care of her basic needs, and feeling utterly dependent on Brian. Now, some of that is just first time parenting and some of it was because I was so incapacitated by the c-section, but I really think some of it went beyond all of that, or at the very least came out of that and then grew. In the past week, I feel like myself. Not some supermom but not an incompetent freak who doesn't deserve children. Just me.
I'm sure there's more but my baby is calling....
Birth
Saturday June 13th was Kaya's due date, but as of Friday night I was still feeling nothing that felt like anything close to labor. I wasn't comfortable, but at 40 weeks pregnant, who is? At about 3:45am I felt the first real contraction, so I started timing them and trying to rest in between each one. They were about 10 minutes apart at that point so I just glanced at the clock to make sure things were on track and rested. Because we were going for a VBAC (Vaginal birth after c-section) they didn't want me to labor at home for too long so I figured when we got near the five minutes apart mark we'd have to think about leaving. But, in the meantime I wanted Brian to be able to rest as much as possible. By 6am the contractions were less than 7 minutes apart, so I got up to take a shower. Brian was up when I got out, and we decided it was probably a good idea to make some calls to get Hayden taken care of for the day.
Michelle and Paul came over with Maria at around 7:30, which was perfect, because we knew Maria was exactly the kind of distraction Hayden would need. Sure enough, they took Hayden with them to Maria's swim class and she occupied herself happily throwing toys in the pool and splashing in puddles, blissfully unaware that her little sister was on her way. In the meantime, we called my mom to come up for the weekend so that Hayden could stay at home in her comfort zone.
After a quick drive through Dunkin Donuts, we made it to the hospital by 8:30. By then, my contractions were 5 minutes apart and I couldn't walk or talk through them. I think we freaked out the front desk guy when I stopped mid-directions to have a contraction. Funny, it's a hospital, you'd think they'd be kind of used to that sort of thing.
We ended up in triage for an hour with an older, fairly grumpy nurse who asked me about where I was on the pain scale about fifty times.
Just a word or two about hypnobirthing: Since the whole idea is to use hypnosis techniques to distance yourself from the intensity of the experience, there are certain things that are discouraged, for example, usually you ask the nurse to word it some way other than "pain" when talking about the scale, and you also tend to discourage talk of time tables, since in hypnobirthing once things get going an hour tends to feel like about 10 minutes anyway, but talking about time can make it harder to stay in that "happy place".
So, I worked on getting myself into hypnosis while listening to a woman on the other side of the screen throwing up, and the nurse marking off my pain scale over and over (I was about a 6 at that point - 4cm with contractions just under 4 minutes apart.) All I wanted to do was get in the tub and relax, but the triage was just never ending. It probably wouldn't have been so bad, but because VBCACs are higher risk, there's a lot of poking, prodding and monitoring that goes on. One thing I did kind of like was the monitor that tracked my contractions. It was nice not having to tell Brian when one was coming since he could just see the rise of the line on the screen. At that point the way it worked was, every time a contraction started, Brian would work on relaxation/visualization/b
Finally, my doctor came and asked if we had seen any rooms. The whole floor is set up like a bed and breakfast and the rooms are all beautiful, with big jacuzzi tubs and all medical necessities tucked behind movable pictures and in other out of the way spots. The first room they showed us was "Charmingfare" the name of the farm we take Hayden to all the time. It seemed like a good omen, and I had zero interest in room hopping, I just wanted to get in the tub ASAP.
We had to wait for the doctor to come in to hook me up to the heart monitor, give me the IV for Group B strep and God knows what else. Luckily, it could all go in the water. But, waiting for the doctor felt like forever. Brian and I danced quite a bit over the course of the next hour. When a contraction came, I'd lean my head into his chest and he'd apply pressure to my lower back - it looked very much like Junior High 80s dancing. It helped quite a bit, and between contractions I could talk and just get settled in. Then, when one came I'd just say, "Brian, over here" and he'd come over and dance.
Just after 10am the doctor came in and checked me. 6cm and around 80% effaced. Not too bad for just a few hours. Finally, they approved me to get in the water. We "lit" some fake candles that we had (nice, gentle flickering) turned on the music and Brian put some eucalyptus on a washcloth (such a great smell! Reminded me of riding on the motorcycle outside of San Francisco). I relaxed in the water and Brian read hypnobirthing scripts to me. Most were water related, so it was pretty easy to just close my eyes and get into the zone. Every time a contraction came, he would switch over to coaching about breathing and relaxing, and I just stayed down in my "hypno-place".
It was interesting because there were people around quite a bit in the next few hours, poking, prodding, trying to take blood, etc. At one point there were three or so people in the room arguing about taking blood. I was in the water too deep and they couldn't get to my arm. I would have moved but they were trying mid-contraction, and there was just no way at that point that I could do anything other than just breathe. The tuned on the lights, came over and started arguing about what they should do. Brian put a washcloth over my eyes and just kept talking to me. I didn't realize any of it was going on until later when he told me about it. I knew he covered my eyes, and I knew there were people in the room, but I didn't have any idea that there was tension or that they were arguing.
There was no clock in the room so I have no idea where things were at time wise, and one of the greatest things about hypnobirthing is that an hour tends to feel like about 10 minutes (because you spend so much of the training convincing your mind of that) but I knew things were getting close because there was no breathing room between contractions and things were much more intense. My friends who have done hypnobirthing and I have talked about whether or not we'd describe the feeling as pain, and after a lot of thought, I'd really have to say no. I guess that's because when I think of pain I think of pulsing, radiating sensations (being cut with a knife or slamming something in a door) whereas this is just so totally different it doesn't really fit into that category. It's just intense, intense pressure. In my mind now I think of it kind of like being forced under water. For a while you're held under water for 30 seconds and you have four minutes to recover, then it's two minutes to recover, and then you only have about 10 seconds to catch your breath before you're down again. The more relaxed you are the more you can just keep going, but if you panic you start to drown and there's just no way to get back to relaxing after that.
The thing that made the biggest difference for me toward the end was the understanding that when you hit the point of wondering what the hell you were thinking, it means you're almost done. I never wanted drugs and I never told Brian I couldn't do it, but at one point I did start to end contractions with, "shit, this is hard" and variations of that basic theme. Right around that time the doctor came in to check me. I was at 8 cm and +1 station (not sure what that means, even now). She said, "things are progressing well; it looks like it will be about another hour, maybe a bit more." Worst moment of the whole experience. The idea that this could go on for another hour almost did me in. Thank God for Erin and Mindy who both told me over and over that when you feel like you can't do it you're almost there. I just told myself over and over that she was wrong, that we were looking at ten minutes, and I imagined a graph in front of me, with all the mountains of contractions I had been through and about another 10 or so ahead of me. I figured I'd take those 10 one at a time and if I needed to add to the chart from there, so be it.
The nurse came in and told me it was probably time to get out of the water, since I could go from 8-10 really quickly. I told her I'd get out of the water after my doctor checked me again. I could just see myself standing there shivering and uncomfortable for an hour if my doctor turned out to be right. She kept trying to convince me to get out, and I told her to get my doctor in for another internal and we'd go from there. I'm sure she thought I was being pushy, but at that point I really didn't care. She left to get the doctor and all of a sudden a strong contraction hit and I found myself pushing. My water broke and I said something like, "I'm sorry, I pushed". The nurse rushed back in and said that I needed to get out of the water. Okay, but by that point, I had no idea how to do it. I was trying not to push, but it was completely beyond my control at that point (kind of like throwing up, the muscles just contracted without my consent). Brian coached me out of the tub step by step and I stood at the door of the bathroom asking where to go from there.
"We need to get her into the bed," the nurse said.
I went over to the bed and stood next to it.
"Can you get in?" the doctor asked?
"No," I told her.
"We need her in the bed," they told Brian. I really didn't think I could get into the bed, and I couldn't for the life of me figure out why they needed me laying in bed. Internals are done in all sorts of positions and situations and the last thing I wanted was to be laying down in a bed, because in terms of gravity there's no worse position to birth in. But, somehow they did manage to get me into the bed. The doctor examined me and then said, "don't push yet, I have to go get your chart". Um, okay. Will do. Again though, it's like throwing up, it's really not something one can control beyond a certain point. I found myself pushing hard with the next contraction, and apologizing as I did so. Brian kept telling me to just go with my body and I think the nurses just adjusted to the fact that this was going to happen with or without a chart. The next contraction her head crowned and they put my hand down to feel it, and then the next contraction I opened my eyes for the first time in about 2 hours and I saw Kaya come out. I never really "pushed" in a traditional sense, it was all muscle contractions and I just went with them. The actual birth part didn't hurt at all (until later when the results of her having been born with her fist up next to her face became apparent).
They put her right on me and she stayed there for about 20 minutes curled up under a blanket. One of the great things about having been in the water was that I wasn't wearing anything so it was skin to skin contact. Not something I thought about at all, but it sure was nice. Just the feeling of looking at her after the whole process and after seeing her born was so different than it was with Hayden. With Hayden I was drugged and scared and they took her away right away and I just felt so removed from the whole process. With Kaya it was the exact experience I had wanted and everything about it just felt so right. The staff was completely blown away by Brian's involvement and coaching (I was too, but I knew from the last time that he'd be amazing). Apparently, for all the natural births they see, the don't see many at all that have the level of husband involvement that this one did. Honestly, there's no way I could have done it without Brian. No way at all. It's just too high a level of focus that's needed and the whole experience is too intense to go through alone, at least for me.
So, in the end on a scale of 1-10 I'd rate it a 10+. Amazing, empowering and beyond anything I've ever imagined. I'd do it again in a heartbeat. Not sure that I'll have the chance, but I just feel so blessed to have had the chance to do it my way after everything that happened with Hayden's birth. Honestly, one of the greatest experiences of my life.
Michelle and Paul came over with Maria at around 7:30, which was perfect, because we knew Maria was exactly the kind of distraction Hayden would need. Sure enough, they took Hayden with them to Maria's swim class and she occupied herself happily throwing toys in the pool and splashing in puddles, blissfully unaware that her little sister was on her way. In the meantime, we called my mom to come up for the weekend so that Hayden could stay at home in her comfort zone.
After a quick drive through Dunkin Donuts, we made it to the hospital by 8:30. By then, my contractions were 5 minutes apart and I couldn't walk or talk through them. I think we freaked out the front desk guy when I stopped mid-directions to have a contraction. Funny, it's a hospital, you'd think they'd be kind of used to that sort of thing.
We ended up in triage for an hour with an older, fairly grumpy nurse who asked me about where I was on the pain scale about fifty times.
Just a word or two about hypnobirthing: Since the whole idea is to use hypnosis techniques to distance yourself from the intensity of the experience, there are certain things that are discouraged, for example, usually you ask the nurse to word it some way other than "pain" when talking about the scale, and you also tend to discourage talk of time tables, since in hypnobirthing once things get going an hour tends to feel like about 10 minutes anyway, but talking about time can make it harder to stay in that "happy place".
So, I worked on getting myself into hypnosis while listening to a woman on the other side of the screen throwing up, and the nurse marking off my pain scale over and over (I was about a 6 at that point - 4cm with contractions just under 4 minutes apart.) All I wanted to do was get in the tub and relax, but the triage was just never ending. It probably wouldn't have been so bad, but because VBCACs are higher risk, there's a lot of poking, prodding and monitoring that goes on. One thing I did kind of like was the monitor that tracked my contractions. It was nice not having to tell Brian when one was coming since he could just see the rise of the line on the screen. At that point the way it worked was, every time a contraction started, Brian would work on relaxation/visualization/b
Finally, my doctor came and asked if we had seen any rooms. The whole floor is set up like a bed and breakfast and the rooms are all beautiful, with big jacuzzi tubs and all medical necessities tucked behind movable pictures and in other out of the way spots. The first room they showed us was "Charmingfare" the name of the farm we take Hayden to all the time. It seemed like a good omen, and I had zero interest in room hopping, I just wanted to get in the tub ASAP.
We had to wait for the doctor to come in to hook me up to the heart monitor, give me the IV for Group B strep and God knows what else. Luckily, it could all go in the water. But, waiting for the doctor felt like forever. Brian and I danced quite a bit over the course of the next hour. When a contraction came, I'd lean my head into his chest and he'd apply pressure to my lower back - it looked very much like Junior High 80s dancing. It helped quite a bit, and between contractions I could talk and just get settled in. Then, when one came I'd just say, "Brian, over here" and he'd come over and dance.
Just after 10am the doctor came in and checked me. 6cm and around 80% effaced. Not too bad for just a few hours. Finally, they approved me to get in the water. We "lit" some fake candles that we had (nice, gentle flickering) turned on the music and Brian put some eucalyptus on a washcloth (such a great smell! Reminded me of riding on the motorcycle outside of San Francisco). I relaxed in the water and Brian read hypnobirthing scripts to me. Most were water related, so it was pretty easy to just close my eyes and get into the zone. Every time a contraction came, he would switch over to coaching about breathing and relaxing, and I just stayed down in my "hypno-place".
It was interesting because there were people around quite a bit in the next few hours, poking, prodding, trying to take blood, etc. At one point there were three or so people in the room arguing about taking blood. I was in the water too deep and they couldn't get to my arm. I would have moved but they were trying mid-contraction, and there was just no way at that point that I could do anything other than just breathe. The tuned on the lights, came over and started arguing about what they should do. Brian put a washcloth over my eyes and just kept talking to me. I didn't realize any of it was going on until later when he told me about it. I knew he covered my eyes, and I knew there were people in the room, but I didn't have any idea that there was tension or that they were arguing.
There was no clock in the room so I have no idea where things were at time wise, and one of the greatest things about hypnobirthing is that an hour tends to feel like about 10 minutes (because you spend so much of the training convincing your mind of that) but I knew things were getting close because there was no breathing room between contractions and things were much more intense. My friends who have done hypnobirthing and I have talked about whether or not we'd describe the feeling as pain, and after a lot of thought, I'd really have to say no. I guess that's because when I think of pain I think of pulsing, radiating sensations (being cut with a knife or slamming something in a door) whereas this is just so totally different it doesn't really fit into that category. It's just intense, intense pressure. In my mind now I think of it kind of like being forced under water. For a while you're held under water for 30 seconds and you have four minutes to recover, then it's two minutes to recover, and then you only have about 10 seconds to catch your breath before you're down again. The more relaxed you are the more you can just keep going, but if you panic you start to drown and there's just no way to get back to relaxing after that.
The thing that made the biggest difference for me toward the end was the understanding that when you hit the point of wondering what the hell you were thinking, it means you're almost done. I never wanted drugs and I never told Brian I couldn't do it, but at one point I did start to end contractions with, "shit, this is hard" and variations of that basic theme. Right around that time the doctor came in to check me. I was at 8 cm and +1 station (not sure what that means, even now). She said, "things are progressing well; it looks like it will be about another hour, maybe a bit more." Worst moment of the whole experience. The idea that this could go on for another hour almost did me in. Thank God for Erin and Mindy who both told me over and over that when you feel like you can't do it you're almost there. I just told myself over and over that she was wrong, that we were looking at ten minutes, and I imagined a graph in front of me, with all the mountains of contractions I had been through and about another 10 or so ahead of me. I figured I'd take those 10 one at a time and if I needed to add to the chart from there, so be it.
The nurse came in and told me it was probably time to get out of the water, since I could go from 8-10 really quickly. I told her I'd get out of the water after my doctor checked me again. I could just see myself standing there shivering and uncomfortable for an hour if my doctor turned out to be right. She kept trying to convince me to get out, and I told her to get my doctor in for another internal and we'd go from there. I'm sure she thought I was being pushy, but at that point I really didn't care. She left to get the doctor and all of a sudden a strong contraction hit and I found myself pushing. My water broke and I said something like, "I'm sorry, I pushed". The nurse rushed back in and said that I needed to get out of the water. Okay, but by that point, I had no idea how to do it. I was trying not to push, but it was completely beyond my control at that point (kind of like throwing up, the muscles just contracted without my consent). Brian coached me out of the tub step by step and I stood at the door of the bathroom asking where to go from there.
"We need to get her into the bed," the nurse said.
I went over to the bed and stood next to it.
"Can you get in?" the doctor asked?
"No," I told her.
"We need her in the bed," they told Brian. I really didn't think I could get into the bed, and I couldn't for the life of me figure out why they needed me laying in bed. Internals are done in all sorts of positions and situations and the last thing I wanted was to be laying down in a bed, because in terms of gravity there's no worse position to birth in. But, somehow they did manage to get me into the bed. The doctor examined me and then said, "don't push yet, I have to go get your chart". Um, okay. Will do. Again though, it's like throwing up, it's really not something one can control beyond a certain point. I found myself pushing hard with the next contraction, and apologizing as I did so. Brian kept telling me to just go with my body and I think the nurses just adjusted to the fact that this was going to happen with or without a chart. The next contraction her head crowned and they put my hand down to feel it, and then the next contraction I opened my eyes for the first time in about 2 hours and I saw Kaya come out. I never really "pushed" in a traditional sense, it was all muscle contractions and I just went with them. The actual birth part didn't hurt at all (until later when the results of her having been born with her fist up next to her face became apparent).
They put her right on me and she stayed there for about 20 minutes curled up under a blanket. One of the great things about having been in the water was that I wasn't wearing anything so it was skin to skin contact. Not something I thought about at all, but it sure was nice. Just the feeling of looking at her after the whole process and after seeing her born was so different than it was with Hayden. With Hayden I was drugged and scared and they took her away right away and I just felt so removed from the whole process. With Kaya it was the exact experience I had wanted and everything about it just felt so right. The staff was completely blown away by Brian's involvement and coaching (I was too, but I knew from the last time that he'd be amazing). Apparently, for all the natural births they see, the don't see many at all that have the level of husband involvement that this one did. Honestly, there's no way I could have done it without Brian. No way at all. It's just too high a level of focus that's needed and the whole experience is too intense to go through alone, at least for me.
So, in the end on a scale of 1-10 I'd rate it a 10+. Amazing, empowering and beyond anything I've ever imagined. I'd do it again in a heartbeat. Not sure that I'll have the chance, but I just feel so blessed to have had the chance to do it my way after everything that happened with Hayden's birth. Honestly, one of the greatest experiences of my life.
Wednesday, June 3, 2009
Words and other updates
Hayden is growing like crazy and while she still speaks in about 50% Muppet, her English skills are coming along. She has "normal" words like "cheese", "shoes" and "bye bye" but she also has those odd words that we just can't quite understand:
GaGa = Still cracker & Duck
DaDuche = Tractor & Jacket
Mummus = Hummus (that one isn't too weird)
I fwy = "I try"
salsas = socks
Bipers = Diapers
Funny language related incident:
We were in the car stopped in traffic and there was a lane of cars stopped next to us. Hayden kept pointing to one of the cars and saying, "Da! Da!" Since "da" usually means, "that" I just figured I'd humor her by saying, "Oh, I see, there's a car there".
She got angry and started waving her arm saying, "Da! Da!"
I said, "Oh, do you see a red car?"
She stopped waving her arms, looked at me and gave a deep, exasperated sigh.
"Woof" she said, and pointed to the dog in the window of the car next to us.
Another one:
For about a week every time we got in the car, Hayden would flip out and scream the entire way home, yelling "I fwy!" at the top of her lungs. I had no idea what "I fwy" meant and there wasn't anything in or around the car that in any way fit in context.
Finally, one day Heidi was outside while I was putting Hayden in her car seat to leave. As usual, she started screaming, "I fwy! I fwy!"
I asked Heidi what she thought it meant and Heidi explained that in "Hayden speak" "I fwy" usually means, "I try" as in, "I want to do it myself".
Sure enough, she wanted to buckle her carseat herself. Once I started letting her do it life got much easier. (Don't get me wrong, she still screams bloody murder every time we go anywhere in the car, but at least she doesn't yell, "I fwy!" constantly.)
GaGa = Still cracker & Duck
DaDuche = Tractor & Jacket
Mummus = Hummus (that one isn't too weird)
I fwy = "I try"
salsas = socks
Bipers = Diapers
Funny language related incident:
We were in the car stopped in traffic and there was a lane of cars stopped next to us. Hayden kept pointing to one of the cars and saying, "Da! Da!" Since "da" usually means, "that" I just figured I'd humor her by saying, "Oh, I see, there's a car there".
She got angry and started waving her arm saying, "Da! Da!"
I said, "Oh, do you see a red car?"
She stopped waving her arms, looked at me and gave a deep, exasperated sigh.
"Woof" she said, and pointed to the dog in the window of the car next to us.
Another one:
For about a week every time we got in the car, Hayden would flip out and scream the entire way home, yelling "I fwy!" at the top of her lungs. I had no idea what "I fwy" meant and there wasn't anything in or around the car that in any way fit in context.
Finally, one day Heidi was outside while I was putting Hayden in her car seat to leave. As usual, she started screaming, "I fwy! I fwy!"
I asked Heidi what she thought it meant and Heidi explained that in "Hayden speak" "I fwy" usually means, "I try" as in, "I want to do it myself".
Sure enough, she wanted to buckle her carseat herself. Once I started letting her do it life got much easier. (Don't get me wrong, she still screams bloody murder every time we go anywhere in the car, but at least she doesn't yell, "I fwy!" constantly.)
Monday, May 4, 2009
One of those days
Hayden has been going through this phase for a while now, off and on. Her strategy (if it's fair to call it that) is: Get very, very angry. Cry. Puke. Sob with big, wracking sobs as mommy and daddy clean up the mess. Get cuddled. Repeat as needed.
Most of the time she does this at home, although it's almost always when there are other people visiting. But, last Sunday she upped the ante a bit. We were at church (that still doesn't roll of the tongue for me...at church...just to clarify, it's about as close to a bunch of tree hugging pagans dancing in the woods as a church is likely to get). Anyway, when we go to church, Hayden goes to the nursery. She cries and clings to me, then Michelle, one of the babysitters takes her and she lunges for me, yelling until I'm out of sight. Then, she turns and looks out the window at the squirrels until I come back. And we're not talking about a four hour Baptist service or anything, this is a 45 minute, tops, Unitarian Universalist service.
Last weekend I went to drop her off and it was the perfect storm of bad baby karma. First, Michelle, the squirrel watcher, wasn't there. The only other kid there was Alex, who is Hayden's age and a sweetheart, but he was screaming bloody murder for his mommy, and that threw Hayden off a bit. I can kind of see why. But, I had it in my head that it would be fine. So, after a few minutes of playing in the water table with her, I turned to leave. She cried, as expected, and lunged for me, as expected. But, I figured, "she'll be fine. She always is." What I didn't count on was that the woman who took her would hold her by the door and stroke her back while she cried. This is not a strategy that works with Hayden. At all. Ever. Distraction is the only hope.
I stood on the other side of the door for a minute, where she couldn't see me, trying to decide what to do. Finally, I decided I'd give her a few minutes, and if she didn't stop crying, I'd go and get her. I went to the couches one room away from the nursery where I listened to a chorus of Alex Hayden screaming. There was an older woman sitting there who was clearly annoyed by the fact that I was letting my child cry. I smiled sheepishly and told her that my daughter always cries for a minute and then she's fine. As if on cue, one of the babysitters came to find me to tell me that Hayden had gotten "a little sick".
She didn't get a little sick. She went completely exorcist baby on the place.
There was puke everywhere. All over the older women who was holding her. All over her, all over the floor, her bag, the toys, the carpet...you name it. It was everywhere. I stripped Hayden down to her diaper, only to realize that her "back up" clothes had been used during a bad pee incident a week before. All she had in there was a grey velvet skirt left over from God knows when and a pink onsie that's almost too small. But, it was better than nothing. While the woman went and cleaned up, I tried to scrub baby puke out of the carpet and off my kid, all the while feeling like the worst.mother.ever. By the time I started cleaning vomit out of her shoes while she sobbed, "shoes! shoes!" (she hates being without shoes) I was about ready to cry myself.
I stayed with her for the rest of the service. My little vomit scented kid playing happily in the water table in her velvet skirt and little onsie, smiling at me and patting my knee saying, "mommy" in that reassuring, "you haven't left me" voice of hers.
Cut to yesterday....
Church again. Needless to say, I'm a bit gun shy at this point, but I'm hopeful that things will work out better. The "squirrel girl" is there, and Alex isn't. The stars were better aligned, no doubt about it. Everything went off without a hitch. Amazing. I felt strangely vindicated. Not a bad mother. Nope, not me.
Last night there was a special May Day service for mothers and daughters. We went with a friend and her newborn. Long story short, Hayden did well up to the point where the service became quite and meditative. She doesn't believe in reflection. So, I figured, "I'll bring her to the nursery, just for a few minutes." What could possibly go wrong?
Well, she didn't throw up on anyone. They were so scared of her that as soon as she started crying, they ran out to get me (squirrel girl was off duty). I held her for the rest of the evening in the back room while she stroked my face and said, "mommy". In the car I asked her if she was sad when I left, "uh hu," she said.
"Did I come back?" I asked.
"Uh hu."
"Do I always come back?"
"Uh hu."
"So, if I leave, you'll know that I'll come back, right?"
Silence. Dead silence.
This morning, for the first time ever, Hayden threw a fit when I left to go to work. Sobbing hysterically, inconsolable. Tonight when I came home she wanted nothing to do with me. She just wanted Daddy. Daddy to hold her, daddy to play bubbles with her. No mommmy. Brian had been with her all afternoon though, so I decided to try to put her to bed to give him a break. She wanted nothing to do with that, but for some reason, I decided it would be fine. She cried and screamed for daddy until I had to give up and get him. By then she was beyond hysterical. There was no calming her down. Brian sat with her for a few minutes and then tried to put her down.
Needless to say, it didn't go well. Leaving her crying is always a recipe for disaster. When Brian came out to the kitchen with her screaming from the other room, I said, "should we get her or let her puke?" Brian took this as more of a rhetorical question than I had intended, and he was frustrated at what felt like a lack of support. In reality though, it was just a question of fact, as in "do we have the energy to clean up baby barf and do laundry tonight, or should we let her win?". In the end, it was decided for us.
The good news? She didn't get the carpet, so about fifteen minutes was cut off our regular time. But, of course, we're still looking at cleaning up a barfy kid and all the collateral damage. When I went to change her, Hayden started to cry harder and said, "No! Bye Bye!" and then reached for Brian.
In the end he put her down and she wouldn't kiss me goodnight. Worst. Mommy. Ever. But, I can't promise that I'll never leave her again. But, for the moment, she's won the battle and she's got the whole war on her side. Biological warfare will do that to a person
Most of the time she does this at home, although it's almost always when there are other people visiting. But, last Sunday she upped the ante a bit. We were at church (that still doesn't roll of the tongue for me...at church...just to clarify, it's about as close to a bunch of tree hugging pagans dancing in the woods as a church is likely to get). Anyway, when we go to church, Hayden goes to the nursery. She cries and clings to me, then Michelle, one of the babysitters takes her and she lunges for me, yelling until I'm out of sight. Then, she turns and looks out the window at the squirrels until I come back. And we're not talking about a four hour Baptist service or anything, this is a 45 minute, tops, Unitarian Universalist service.
Last weekend I went to drop her off and it was the perfect storm of bad baby karma. First, Michelle, the squirrel watcher, wasn't there. The only other kid there was Alex, who is Hayden's age and a sweetheart, but he was screaming bloody murder for his mommy, and that threw Hayden off a bit. I can kind of see why. But, I had it in my head that it would be fine. So, after a few minutes of playing in the water table with her, I turned to leave. She cried, as expected, and lunged for me, as expected. But, I figured, "she'll be fine. She always is." What I didn't count on was that the woman who took her would hold her by the door and stroke her back while she cried. This is not a strategy that works with Hayden. At all. Ever. Distraction is the only hope.
I stood on the other side of the door for a minute, where she couldn't see me, trying to decide what to do. Finally, I decided I'd give her a few minutes, and if she didn't stop crying, I'd go and get her. I went to the couches one room away from the nursery where I listened to a chorus of Alex Hayden screaming. There was an older woman sitting there who was clearly annoyed by the fact that I was letting my child cry. I smiled sheepishly and told her that my daughter always cries for a minute and then she's fine. As if on cue, one of the babysitters came to find me to tell me that Hayden had gotten "a little sick".
She didn't get a little sick. She went completely exorcist baby on the place.
There was puke everywhere. All over the older women who was holding her. All over her, all over the floor, her bag, the toys, the carpet...you name it. It was everywhere. I stripped Hayden down to her diaper, only to realize that her "back up" clothes had been used during a bad pee incident a week before. All she had in there was a grey velvet skirt left over from God knows when and a pink onsie that's almost too small. But, it was better than nothing. While the woman went and cleaned up, I tried to scrub baby puke out of the carpet and off my kid, all the while feeling like the worst.mother.ever. By the time I started cleaning vomit out of her shoes while she sobbed, "shoes! shoes!" (she hates being without shoes) I was about ready to cry myself.
I stayed with her for the rest of the service. My little vomit scented kid playing happily in the water table in her velvet skirt and little onsie, smiling at me and patting my knee saying, "mommy" in that reassuring, "you haven't left me" voice of hers.
Cut to yesterday....
Church again. Needless to say, I'm a bit gun shy at this point, but I'm hopeful that things will work out better. The "squirrel girl" is there, and Alex isn't. The stars were better aligned, no doubt about it. Everything went off without a hitch. Amazing. I felt strangely vindicated. Not a bad mother. Nope, not me.
Last night there was a special May Day service for mothers and daughters. We went with a friend and her newborn. Long story short, Hayden did well up to the point where the service became quite and meditative. She doesn't believe in reflection. So, I figured, "I'll bring her to the nursery, just for a few minutes." What could possibly go wrong?
Well, she didn't throw up on anyone. They were so scared of her that as soon as she started crying, they ran out to get me (squirrel girl was off duty). I held her for the rest of the evening in the back room while she stroked my face and said, "mommy". In the car I asked her if she was sad when I left, "uh hu," she said.
"Did I come back?" I asked.
"Uh hu."
"Do I always come back?"
"Uh hu."
"So, if I leave, you'll know that I'll come back, right?"
Silence. Dead silence.
This morning, for the first time ever, Hayden threw a fit when I left to go to work. Sobbing hysterically, inconsolable. Tonight when I came home she wanted nothing to do with me. She just wanted Daddy. Daddy to hold her, daddy to play bubbles with her. No mommmy. Brian had been with her all afternoon though, so I decided to try to put her to bed to give him a break. She wanted nothing to do with that, but for some reason, I decided it would be fine. She cried and screamed for daddy until I had to give up and get him. By then she was beyond hysterical. There was no calming her down. Brian sat with her for a few minutes and then tried to put her down.
Needless to say, it didn't go well. Leaving her crying is always a recipe for disaster. When Brian came out to the kitchen with her screaming from the other room, I said, "should we get her or let her puke?" Brian took this as more of a rhetorical question than I had intended, and he was frustrated at what felt like a lack of support. In reality though, it was just a question of fact, as in "do we have the energy to clean up baby barf and do laundry tonight, or should we let her win?". In the end, it was decided for us.
The good news? She didn't get the carpet, so about fifteen minutes was cut off our regular time. But, of course, we're still looking at cleaning up a barfy kid and all the collateral damage. When I went to change her, Hayden started to cry harder and said, "No! Bye Bye!" and then reached for Brian.
In the end he put her down and she wouldn't kiss me goodnight. Worst. Mommy. Ever. But, I can't promise that I'll never leave her again. But, for the moment, she's won the battle and she's got the whole war on her side. Biological warfare will do that to a person
Friday, February 27, 2009
Hayden's top ten
So, we're neck deep in the plague around here, and it's totally my fault. I was off this whole week, and Hayden really doesn't do well day after day at home, so, even though her buddy, Maria was just getting over the flu, we went out together on Wednesday. Maria was sick Sunday into Monday, and we had been over there on Sunday, so we figured if Hayden didn't already catch the bug, she'd be fine. And then, as if that wasn't tempting fate enough, yesterday we visited another friend who is on medication for an ear ache. The reality though is that Hayden probably caught this from licking a grocery cart or something.
Whatever the case, last night at 11pm Hayden woke up with all the telltale signs of croup. She sounded awful, wheezing and barking, and she was terrified. We got her into the bathroom and turned on the steam full blast, called the doctor just to see what to watch for, and basically resigned ourselves to a long night. She said "Daddy" constantly, but she didn't actually want Daddy, so we decided to let him sleep while I did a circuit course around the house.
Kitchen for the sippy cup that she'd push away after crying for it. Bedroom to rock in the chair that squeaks so loudly it drove us both to distraction. Bathroom to sit on the floor watching Brainy Baby on the tv I dragged in there, steam going full blast, hot to the point that it messed up one of the windows in there. And then, to the living room to sit on the couch watching random middle of the night tv. I know the Cartoon Network has a moral obligation to appeal to the stoner public in their late night programming, but nothing says desperation like having your kid watch barely concealed animation porn at 3am. This is when On Demand would be a godsend.
From 11pm to 4am, Hayden didn't sleep. At all. And every time I drifted off on the couch, she'd poke me and wheeze out, "No! Off" and insist that I get up and move her to the next location on her agenda. It was like being on a forced march. Finally, at 4am she fell asleep on top of me on the bathroom floor watching farm animals on her baby video. She's been obsessed with roosters for a long time now, and by the grace of God, there was a whole rooster segment in this one. It relaxed her enough to put her out. For three hours anyway.
She was back up at 7am, but Brian took her for that shift. He had to go to work though, so from about 10am on Hayden busied herself projectile vomiting, and I chased her around with paper towels. This is when wide pine flooring in the bedroom feels like a decidedly bad idea. I still haven't really tackled the aftermath of that one.
We managed a record nine clothing changes between us. It was like Baby Flu Catwalk, a new outfit every fifteen minutes. I learned a few things though. First, never dress a puking kid in a onesie. The only thing worse than being covered in vomit, is being covered in vomit, reaching down the vomit covered pants of your child to unsnap them. Also, if the barfing kid wants to watch 14 straight hours of tv, let her. Upsetting her just makes it worse, and in the end, you'll give up anyway, only by then you'll reek of baby puke.
Hayden became quite the tv critic today over the course of her 14 hours. Here are her top ten baby shows, worst to best. The worst left her wheezing out "Nuh No" and saying "All Done" in baby sign language. The best had her lifting her sweaty little head and applauding. The ones in the middle are ranked according to how long she left them on before she insisted on something new, and on how many times she was willing to rewatch them over the course of the day.
Top Ten Baby Shows According to Hayden:
10. The Wiggles (That is one creepy show. I took it as a good sign that she was afraid of the pedophile looking pirate)
9. Dora the Explorer
8. Word World
7. Sid the Science Kid
6. Curious George
5. Yo Gabba Gabba (Now, that's a stoner show. The Andre 2000 DJ in a leisure suit? The Gabba Gabbas that live in a retro 80s Boom Box? It's good stuff. I think it would have beat out Elmo's World if the whole plot of this one hadn't revolved around the bathroom. Hayden was just too traumatized by the steam room experience to want to spend more time vicariously in the bathroom)
4. Elmo's World (not the rest of Sesame Street, just Elmo's World. What's with Mr. Noodle though? He's not someone I'd ever want my child spending time with.)
3. Backyardigans (All the colorful kid appeal of Barney without the creep factor)
2. Wonder Pets. (They're just cool. Who doesn't love a chick in a WW2 Flying Ace hat?)
1. Classical Baby: The Music Show. Grand Prize Winner, hands down.
And now, 21 hours later, Hayden is sleeping soundly. Let's just hope this lasts.
Whatever the case, last night at 11pm Hayden woke up with all the telltale signs of croup. She sounded awful, wheezing and barking, and she was terrified. We got her into the bathroom and turned on the steam full blast, called the doctor just to see what to watch for, and basically resigned ourselves to a long night. She said "Daddy" constantly, but she didn't actually want Daddy, so we decided to let him sleep while I did a circuit course around the house.
Kitchen for the sippy cup that she'd push away after crying for it. Bedroom to rock in the chair that squeaks so loudly it drove us both to distraction. Bathroom to sit on the floor watching Brainy Baby on the tv I dragged in there, steam going full blast, hot to the point that it messed up one of the windows in there. And then, to the living room to sit on the couch watching random middle of the night tv. I know the Cartoon Network has a moral obligation to appeal to the stoner public in their late night programming, but nothing says desperation like having your kid watch barely concealed animation porn at 3am. This is when On Demand would be a godsend.
From 11pm to 4am, Hayden didn't sleep. At all. And every time I drifted off on the couch, she'd poke me and wheeze out, "No! Off" and insist that I get up and move her to the next location on her agenda. It was like being on a forced march. Finally, at 4am she fell asleep on top of me on the bathroom floor watching farm animals on her baby video. She's been obsessed with roosters for a long time now, and by the grace of God, there was a whole rooster segment in this one. It relaxed her enough to put her out. For three hours anyway.
She was back up at 7am, but Brian took her for that shift. He had to go to work though, so from about 10am on Hayden busied herself projectile vomiting, and I chased her around with paper towels. This is when wide pine flooring in the bedroom feels like a decidedly bad idea. I still haven't really tackled the aftermath of that one.
We managed a record nine clothing changes between us. It was like Baby Flu Catwalk, a new outfit every fifteen minutes. I learned a few things though. First, never dress a puking kid in a onesie. The only thing worse than being covered in vomit, is being covered in vomit, reaching down the vomit covered pants of your child to unsnap them. Also, if the barfing kid wants to watch 14 straight hours of tv, let her. Upsetting her just makes it worse, and in the end, you'll give up anyway, only by then you'll reek of baby puke.
Hayden became quite the tv critic today over the course of her 14 hours. Here are her top ten baby shows, worst to best. The worst left her wheezing out "Nuh No" and saying "All Done" in baby sign language. The best had her lifting her sweaty little head and applauding. The ones in the middle are ranked according to how long she left them on before she insisted on something new, and on how many times she was willing to rewatch them over the course of the day.
Top Ten Baby Shows According to Hayden:
10. The Wiggles (That is one creepy show. I took it as a good sign that she was afraid of the pedophile looking pirate)
9. Dora the Explorer
8. Word World
7. Sid the Science Kid
6. Curious George
5. Yo Gabba Gabba (Now, that's a stoner show. The Andre 2000 DJ in a leisure suit? The Gabba Gabbas that live in a retro 80s Boom Box? It's good stuff. I think it would have beat out Elmo's World if the whole plot of this one hadn't revolved around the bathroom. Hayden was just too traumatized by the steam room experience to want to spend more time vicariously in the bathroom)
4. Elmo's World (not the rest of Sesame Street, just Elmo's World. What's with Mr. Noodle though? He's not someone I'd ever want my child spending time with.)
3. Backyardigans (All the colorful kid appeal of Barney without the creep factor)
2. Wonder Pets. (They're just cool. Who doesn't love a chick in a WW2 Flying Ace hat?)
1. Classical Baby: The Music Show. Grand Prize Winner, hands down.
And now, 21 hours later, Hayden is sleeping soundly. Let's just hope this lasts.
Monday, February 16, 2009
Do as I say....
Hayden is really into brushing her teeth right now. She won't accept any help (story of our life) but she loves doing it. So, I try to model good teeth brushing as often as possible so she gets the concept.
Last night, she was brushing her teeth with gusto, really getting the concept and doing it right. Before I could stop her though, she took the brush out of her mouth, turned, and spit on the floor.
I guess it's time to move on to phase two: Get the child a stool to stand on.
Last night, she was brushing her teeth with gusto, really getting the concept and doing it right. Before I could stop her though, she took the brush out of her mouth, turned, and spit on the floor.
I guess it's time to move on to phase two: Get the child a stool to stand on.
Wednesday, February 11, 2009
Our first conversation
Yesterday Hayden and I had our first conversation. She's into saying "uh hu" right now (she doesn't say "yes" yet). And, of course, she says "no" all the time.
Anyway, we were walking to the car from Heidi's.
"Did you have fun at daycare?" I asked.
"Uh hu".
"Did you play with Maria?"
"Uh hu."
"Did you go for a walk in the mud?"
"Uh hu."
"Did you go to see Fred?"
Long pause. We don't know anyone named Fred.
"No."
"Do you want to go home to see Daddy?"
"Daddy!!!"
So, that's it. The first ever conversation with my child. :)
Anyway, we were walking to the car from Heidi's.
"Did you have fun at daycare?" I asked.
"Uh hu".
"Did you play with Maria?"
"Uh hu."
"Did you go for a walk in the mud?"
"Uh hu."
"Did you go to see Fred?"
Long pause. We don't know anyone named Fred.
"No."
"Do you want to go home to see Daddy?"
"Daddy!!!"
So, that's it. The first ever conversation with my child. :)
Sunday, January 18, 2009
Bobby.
So, I'm Bobby. I guess it's better than "Daddy" or "Heidi" my two names up until about three days ago. Now I'm Bobby. Hayden says it with great excitement though, so I'll take it. Other words:
Shoes! (Always said with awe and excitement)
Hi
Off (to mean on, off or down)
Bye
Santa (always with a goofy grin)
Daddy
Bobby ;)
Heidi
Cheese! (Her favorite)
Hmmm (for hummus)
Doo Doo (for rooster)
GaGa (cracker and duck. Usually the context clues help with that one.)
NahNah All done - said with the sign language gesture for "all done")
NO! (how could I have forgotten that one?!)
BaBa (Bottle)
There are more I'm sure, and a lot of words that she'll copy (from "Apple" to "I love you")
First sentence?
Kev swears her first sentence was "You're still there!" while playing peek-a-boo. I heard it too, clear as day, but it's hard for me to think it was real. Kind of like the plant speaking in full sentences.
She said "I love you" with prompting
Tonight in the tub she was putting toys on her feet and I said, "You did that". She responded "I did that". Cool on a few levels, mostly because she changed "you" for "I". Still, I'm not sure I'm totally sold that she says all those things given that most of the time she speaks only fluent Muppet.
Shoes! (Always said with awe and excitement)
Hi
Off (to mean on, off or down)
Bye
Santa (always with a goofy grin)
Daddy
Bobby ;)
Heidi
Cheese! (Her favorite)
Hmmm (for hummus)
Doo Doo (for rooster)
GaGa (cracker and duck. Usually the context clues help with that one.)
NahNah All done - said with the sign language gesture for "all done")
NO! (how could I have forgotten that one?!)
BaBa (Bottle)
There are more I'm sure, and a lot of words that she'll copy (from "Apple" to "I love you")
First sentence?
Kev swears her first sentence was "You're still there!" while playing peek-a-boo. I heard it too, clear as day, but it's hard for me to think it was real. Kind of like the plant speaking in full sentences.
She said "I love you" with prompting
Tonight in the tub she was putting toys on her feet and I said, "You did that". She responded "I did that". Cool on a few levels, mostly because she changed "you" for "I". Still, I'm not sure I'm totally sold that she says all those things given that most of the time she speaks only fluent Muppet.
Saturday, January 17, 2009
Hayden, obsessed with Uncle Kev's hat. Note the binky/cigar action there.
Spinning, the all time favorite pastime. Hayden is obsessed with spinning. She can get herself going so fast that her head can't stay upright. She does this thing where she twists on the bottom of her foot and just gets going like crazy. We worry that she takes after Uncle Kev and his rave obsessed ways. 
This is Daddy walking Hayden around on her hands. Note the shoes. It's a good thing they both think it's funny. 
You can't see it in the photo, but Hayden is trying on her new shoes from Bamma. She's crazy about shoes. Everything is "shoes?!?" (always said with a hint of a question, like she just can't believe her luck). Bare feet "Shoes?!" footed pjs "shoes?!" Thank God the closest they come to designer baby shoes is Robeez. She'll be dangerous when she gets older. 
I thought this one showed the preggo me better, but really it's more of a photo of the tree. Cool tree, smells like oranges and it hasn't lost a needle yet a month and a half after we cut it down.
Holiday photos: Christmas morning with Hayden's Christmas morning Crazy Hair. Opening presents with Mommy, Hayden and Maria on New Year's Eve, and a very blurry photo of the family. I didn't realize how out of focus it was, but making it sharper will mean deleting all of these and I'm not having the easiest time uploading photos.
Christmas was a lot of fun. Hayden is really into saying "Santa" these days. She doesn't say "Mommy" but she says "Santa" with this goofy grin on her face all the time. She did really well opening presents and waiting her turn while other people opened theirs (I'm figuring this will be the last Christmas where that really happens for a while!) Her favorite gifts? A baby with a bathtub from Nana and fake food for her kitchen. She also got a Little People garage from Uncle Kevin and Auntie Lorrie that's a big hit. Christmas itself was pretty much devoted to opening presents and eating. Not a bad way to spend a day!
Oh, the photo with the fish is Brian and Hayden at the LL Bean Outlet in Freeport, ME. They have a big fish tank there with a little bubble you can stand in to be "in" the tank. As you can imagine....big hit!
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